Next month will mark one year since I graduated college. Excuse me, but WHAT?! First of all, I find that nearly impossible to believe, second of all, so much has changed. I knew that a lot would be different (that’s why my mantra for 2017 was “growth comes from discomfort.” I wanted to prepare myself), but what I didn’t fully anticipate was how much my friendships would change.
They say that once you graduate it’s much harder to see your friends. I thought I had a solution to that: “well, we all live in New Jersey, how hard can it be?” Perks of going to a state college, right? Despite our relative geographic proximity, it has been incredibly difficult to see my friends on what I would consider a regular basis.
So, how do you deal with conflicting schedules and competing priorities and the general challenge of remaining close when you’re not living right next door? Here are the saving graces I’ve found one year out.
FaceTime…FaceTime, FaceTime, FaceTime
FaceTime is a life saver! Sometimes it really is just too hard to get together in person and quick texts don’t do the trick. That’s when a FaceTime date saves the day. Although a spontaneous call is nice, you’re usually better off scheduling it ahead of time so you don’t end up playing phone tag.
Set goals
A few months after graduating, you and your friends will have a pretty good idea of how often is reasonable to expect to see each other in person. Of course there will be ebbs and flows in availability, but you’ll have a baseline. From there you can set goals of how often you’ll see each other and actually put it on the calendar. Sometimes you won’t be able to meet the goals, but having something to work towards gives you a better shot than thinking “hey, wonder how long it’s been since I saw *insert name of friend here*.”
Give yourself grace
A lot of times when I pick the topic of a blog post, it usually indicates something I’m working on myself. Although I would love to see all of my friends frequently, the reality is that it’s a challenge and it will continue to change as time goes on. Figuring out how to spend your time (at work, on side projects, with family, with your significant other, with friends, and throwing in some alone time too) is tough, but by giving yourself grace to do your best, you’ll be able to stay close to those you love and not wear yourself too thin either.
How do prioritize seeing friends after college? I would love any advice you have!
AJF
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